“Man, are you smoking crack or something?” HAHAHAHHAHAHA. This is probably the single funniest comeback ever uttered by mankind. Literally, it’s so funny that every person uses it at least once in their life. It’s so awesome that teachers use it and AUTOMATICALLY seem cool to their kids.
Keep reading »
Funniest thing ever to say ever: What Are You Smoking?
A Critical Analysis of the Lyrics to Tik Tok by Ke$ha
I’ll admit it. The first time I heard “Tik Tok” by Ke$ha I thought to myself, “Oh, god dammit, what is music coming to these days.” But then. I listened to the lyrics. I mean REALLY listened and I tell you what. I was stunned. Beneath all the loops and autotunage and stupid dollar sign for the S was a real anthem for social activism. Let’s take a look.
Keep reading »
Super Awkward: Rearview Mirror Eye Contact
It’s true, random eye contact is almost always awkward. No matter the situation. With some waitress across a room. With your boss. With your best friend. Every time it happens its horrible. And usually accompanied by some head movements to try and mask it. A stretch. A look over the shoulder. But. The most awkward of all eye contact is creepy rearview mirror eye contact.
Keep reading »
New Years Eve: Worst Holiday of the Year
No. I don’t like holidays. Pretty much any of them. Sure, I guess that a few have a couple redeeming qualities but for the most part its just plain awful. Cards. Presents. Special programming. Foods centered around turkeys. All of it. But no other holiday presents all the little annoyances of New Years Eve.
Keep reading »
Friday Quick Hitters: Christmas Edition
We’ve rounded up some of the best Christmas links the web has to offer. If you’ve got time – and you know you do – be awesome and check them out.
This Guy Wins: Christmas Light Edition
New feature on Surly Birds, we’re going to highlight dudes (or dudettes) who win. No reason to argue it. No reason to analyze it. These people just flat-out win. For instance, this guy won because this is the best approach to Christmas lights we’ve ever seen.
Car Knowledge: The Bane Of My Existence
I don’t know anything about cars. Really. Not a goddamn thing. I have absolutely no clue how to do most things as it relates to a car. Oh sure. I have theories – “That sound? Probably a screw loose in the panel, it’ll go away”. I’ve had my car towed several times because I figured the starter was out only to find out a needed a new battery (I ALWAYS blame the starter because it’s name implies its in charge of the whole starting thing). Keep reading »
Friday Quick Hitters
It’s been a while since we’ve done these, but it’s Friday, and there’s been a lot going on in the world that we think warrants further discussion. So, Friday Quick Hitters it is…
Palin Book Signing
That’s it. We’re convinced. And we have no doubt you will be too after watching the video we’ve included after the fold. There’s just no arguing with all the insight offered by America’s finest. Palin in 2012.
Why I Hate the Ocean, Pt. 3
Oh. We’re back. We have more disgusting oceanic creatures that completely justify our hatred of the ocean. That enormous, horrible cesspool.
Keep reading »