Kia: World’s Worst Motor Coach
We’ve compiled a comprehensive list of things that will never be uttered about a Kia:
“Hey, you gotta come look at my new Kia. It’s awesome”
“Dude, your Kia is fucking awesome”
“Talk about Pussy-magnet”
“Good investment”
“Yeah, you probably didn’t need the warranty”
“I love Kias dude, great choice for a brand new car”
“You know, now that I have a family, safety has been on my mind – that’s why I got this Kia minivan”
“That’s what I told him, Porsches and BMWs are cool and all, but for my money, it’s Kia”
“My car doesn’t come from a country without a demilitarized zone that keeps the world in constant danger of a huge and bloody and possibly nuclear conflict”
“I could afford a lot more, but I really felt the Kia just fit my personality better”
**READER DOMINATION**
“My Kia Sephia has gotten me laid more times than wine coolers and ruhynol combined.”
“Never race a guy in a Kia. You know he’s crazy as hell.”
“I always try to find a parking spot next to a Kia because I know the owner of the Kia would never ding up his doors but hitting my car.”
“I knew he was the one when he pulled up in a Kia.”
“If you’re lucky I’ll let you drive my Kia.”
“Sure, it ruins my reputation if I’m ever seen driving in one, but it’s not like I’m going to murder someone in my Bentley…”
“You going to get spinners on that bad boy or what?”
“I think the Kia was originally created to use in combat.”
“I’m just saying, if you slap a number 88 on the side I can’t tell the difference between the Kia and Earnhardt Jr’s car.”
“Is it really all that important to bailout the big three U.S. auto-makers… fuck’m. Why, when we all could be driving KIAs.”
“I lost my virginity in the backseat of my Kia.”
Hey pretty lady, this is my cherry red Kia Spectra with tan leather interior. Wanna go for a ride in it?
“We blew the doors off that Hyundai.”
“Does this new Kia come with a car cover or do I have to buy one separate?”
“And sometimes when I’m bored, I drive my Kia like this…”
We’re open to all sorts of new suggestions, just put them in the comments below and we’ll add as time goes on.
My Kia Sephia has gotten me laid more times than wine coolers and ruhynol combined.
“Never race a guy in a Kia. You know he’s crazy as hell.”
“I always try to find a parking spot next to a Kia because I know the owner of the Kia would never ding up his doors but hitting my car.”
“I knew he was the one when he pulled up in a Kia.”
“If you’re lucky I’ll let you drive my Kia.”
Has anyone ever noticed that the symbol for Kia looks like the Greek letters Kappa Iota Lambda, which would be pronounced “Kill”?
With that in mind,
“Sure, it ruins my reputation if I’m ever seen driving in one, but it’s not like I’m going to murder someone in my Bentley…”
“You going to get spinners on that bad boy or what?”
“I think the Kia was originally created to use in combat.”
I’m just saying, if you slap a number 88 on the side I can’t tell the difference between the Kia and Earnhardt Jr’s car.
Is it really all that important to bailout the big three U.S. auto-makers… fuck’m. Why, when we all could be driving KIAs.
“I lost my virginity in the backseat of my Kia.”
Hey pretty lady, this is my cherry red Kia Spectra with tan leather interior. Wanna go for a ride in it?
“We blew the doors off that Hyundai.”
Does this new Kia come with a car cover or do I have to buy one separate?
And sometimes when I’m bored, I drive my Kia like this…
“This car is my life!”
this is just a WOULD YOU RATHER question:
would you rather be a convicted sex offender or drive a kia spectra
dude, the nitrous is for the kia…
“Could you please park that piece of shit beamer on the side of the road? I pay more rent than you do and I should be able to park my kia in the garage”