The Single Scariest Moment of Your Life
I know what you’re thinking – being thrown in a pit of snakes. Standing on the edge of a skyscraper. Basically the one part of Fear Factor that you wouldn’t have survived. But no. What I’m talking about is much, much scarier. And I’m certain it’s happened to all of you. I’m talking about when you’re having an AIM conversation with a buddy or co-worker and you accidentally mix up the windows. That millisecond after you press the Return button is the single scariest moment in a person’s life, guaranteed.
Think about it. You and your gal pal, let’s call her Erica, are having a convo about your mutual friend Rachel. You are both so mad at her for the way she’s been acting recently, but you haven’t really said anything, cause ‘that’s just the way she is sometimes.’ Meanwhile, you’re talking to Rachel casually in another window. Eventually, you and Erica get so worked up, that you end up making fun of Rachel’s unfortunate case of ‘cankles’. You’re LOL’ing like crazy. That is until you realize that Erica isn’t responding and your mouse had wandered over and clicked on Rachel’s window somehow. Your heart drops. You gasp for air. Panic button.
At this point, my absolute favorite thing to do is watch people try and back out of it. The go-to move is to make a joke out of it. To add a hurried ‘LOL’ to make it seem like you were just joking. The nuance of the Internet will get you through this one, right? No. Obviously you’re lying. So now you’ve insulted someone’s ability to distinguish calf from ankle to the naked eye, and you’ve lied to them. Things are going well.
Look, I’ve seen this happen a million times. I’ve even been a victim of it, too. And for those of you that use Adium instead of AIM or Gchat, (I’m assuming everyone’s off Yahoo finally) I bet it’s happened even more. There’s simply no scarier five seconds in the course of human existence than when you realize that you mixed up messenger windows. Especially when you’re in the middle of ripping apart some poor, unsuspecting friend of yours.
So there it is. Can anyone think of something scarier than that? I’m all ears. Let’s hear what you got.
You find yourself in a completely dark room, pitch black, you cant see anything. You begin to feel around and find that you are in a corner of a room. From the way your footsteps echo, you get the feeling that you are in a closed space perhaps the size of a classroom. All of a sudden the lights flicker for a split second, long enough for you to see a figure in the opposite corner of the room. “hello?!” you stammer, in a horse, barely audible voice. No answer, must of been a coat rack. The lights flicker again, no figure in the corner. The hairs on your neck stand on end, and from a few feet to your left, you hear breathing…..
Dan is actually describing his last doctor’s appointment.
haha, owned
Being eaten by a giant squid…
#1 they have tentacles
#2 they have a giant beak
#3 you are drowning
#4 nobody knows anything about them, therefore you have no clue how to even begin to defend yourself
hahahaha i remember when you brought up rachel’s cankles when we were watching tv
Similar phenomenon, but reply: all’ing when you meant to only reply to the original sender. I once emailed all my coworkers about how dumb one of them is. With her copied.
I also have “joey” and “john” on my g-chat list. Joey and I make inappropriate jokes and talk about how little we do at work all day, how drunk we got the previous night, and how drunk we still are, while at work. John is my boss. The mixup has happened. A few times.
Not sure how I still have a job.
Long story short, I was talking to a girl about a recent breakup with her friend, whom I was still hoping to reconcile and have a long and lasting relationship. I meant to message Josie (the friend) and instead I texted Marie (the ex-gf): “I sill don’t know what the fuck that dyke’s problem is.”
We’re not together, been masturbating frequently since